InDefinition - 84

Wetherspoonerism, n. accidental transposition of initial sounds or letters, drink having been taken. E.g.

Late home for supper,
he mustn't seem drunk.
'The pob cluck,' he begins,
And knows he is sunk.

- Wendy Cope, 'Timekeeping'

Books I've actually finished lately: 119

Conversation with my mother is like everyone's conversation with their mothers, but with a twist.
     'How come you never tell me what you're up to, but you reveal your innermost thoughts and most shameful anecdotes to everyone who reads the New Statesman?'
     'Well, if you match their rates we may be able to come to some arrangement...'

- Nicholas Lezard

The (Sports)Writer's Life

Dolled-up women prefer to have their bottoms pinched by international cricketers and not by those who write about them.

- Shehan Karunatilaka, Chinaman

Day jobs of the poets: Abdullah Husain (novelist)

Abdullah Sahab had an impish sense of humor and a hearty laugh, especially after a drink or two. He knew his whiskey. He famously ran an off license in South London for years before returning to Lahore. When somebody in the audience at the Karachi Literary Festival misunderstood the nature of the operation, asking him whether it was becoming for somebody of his stature to deliver liquor to clients, he responded, "I didn't go to them. They came to me."

- HM Naqvi, in Scroll.in

'Bollocks'

On why the Aussie accent's the result of heavy drinking.

Or not.

Zaftig vs Sidebottom

Extraordinary interview with Erica Jong in last Saturday`s Times. According to Jong a lot of the 'bad boy' writers who gave her books bad reviews had more than literary criteria on their minds. "I was too zaftig [curvy] to get a good review. Look at all the women who are praised. They`re either very, very skinny or very, very fat. Some of them are hunchback, and some of them enormously fat" - offensive remark about Hilary Mantel omitted [LOLZ] - "Not one of them is a woman you would want to f***." 

Some years ago I gave Jong`s Sappho`s Leap a very bad review in the TLS. At the time I thought I did this because it was a very bad book. Now I know differently. 

Glad she cleared all that up.

- Harry Sidebottom, on Facebook

In other news, I've just looked up a boozy interview I did with Dr Sidebottom. 1) I note Ms Jong was referenced; and 2) I can vouch his books have since also made it to Afghanistan.

Keystroke twins - 33

barmaid
carnage

The lives of other writers

Or - Two friends record their recent experiences in the book 'business'.

William Brown, author of Supercinema: Film-Philosophy for the Digital Age



Howard Male, author of Etc Etc Amen

Books I've actually finished lately: 61

As inscribed by Dominic Scott Hilton, from his death-bed:

For the lowest life of them all. 

Love,
YOUR MUM's lover 

Wellington Hospital 25.11.14

Morkkis

[with thanks to whomever I nicked this off, on Twitter]

Books I've actually finished lately: 50

I am keen to know why Macfarlane-Deakin took 'two hipflasks (one of whisky, one of arak)' - and where they got their 'arak' from, in Dorset.

Frumious Bandersnatch, orator

InDefinition - 71

breverage, n. alright, just a quick one, then

Books I've actually finished lately: 32

Titles gone begging - 4

The Master and Margarita: Henry James and the iniquities of the cocktail hour

Byron's drinking habits

ROB: Now, Trelawny is worried, cos he's concerned that Byron is gonna take Shelley's skull - because he already had a skull which he used to drink from. 

STEVE: Yeah, see, I think that lets Byron down... All that sort of great passionate poetry, and then you find out he used to drink from a novelty mug.

- The Trip to Italy

#halfwitslag

Too cryptic?

Try here.

Equinimity (and other Kafka jokes)

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, “Why the long face?” 

“I was born into servitude, and when I die, my feet will be turned into glue,” replied the horse. 

The bartender realized he would not be getting a tip.

- John McNamee, 'Kafka's Joke Book'

i.m. Omar Khayyám (or, 'Clause 56')

d. 4.10.1131

For "Is" and "Is-not" though with Rule and Line
And "Up" and "Down" by Logic I define,
Of all that one should care to fathom,
Was never deep in anything but--Wine.

- The Rubaiyat, transl. Edward FitzGerald

[with thanks to AC, for the tip-off]

InDefinition - 52

manter, n. calling your best mate, e.g. a 'cunt' (while knowing that he's still gonna get his round in)